Me, in June: I really want to blog more, I have so many ideas!
Me, now: Ughhhhhhhhhh
Yes, I have school and all the other fun life things again and for some reason, I just can’t finish one of my 30 half-written blog posts so this is me trying to fit as many topics in one blog post as I can before I fuck off for another week or so. It’s not that I don’t like my blog or anything, there are just so many things I want to do and blogging hasn’t been in my top 5 recently.
School is back and I’m really enjoying it! It’s been going on for a month now and I honestly have to say that I missed learning over the summer. I definitely need to be challenged and I like learning a lot of new stuff, even though a bunch of my school subjects are not entirely my thing. Especially maths, one of my economics classes and technology, but whatever. I really like history and English and I’m so far really good in my classes so yay! We had to write a paper over the summer (that was my first time ever writing something like that and I just got it back and have the best grade possible so oh my god???) I’m also able to have a few presentations/projects about topics I’m interested in so that’s great. It’s so weird though because I’m going to be finished with school in just seven months and that’s… really not a long time. And then I have to decide what to study and where and that’s just a whole other huge topic that tends to send me into an existential crisis.
I’m reading so, so much and I couldn’t be happier about it. Sure, it’s not quite as much as during the holidays but still. Some recent faves include An Absolutely Remarkable Thing (for which I’m still trying to write a review), A Closed And Common Orbit, Pulp and What If It’s Us, which I all rated five stars! I got a bunch of really amazing ARCs through NetGalley and sometimes Edelweiss and I’m so glad my taste is really not betraying me and I always seem to pick out great books. Right now I’m really into sci-fi and gay stuff (like, even more than before, if you can believe that) but I also try to find more books about groups of friends or other really interesting relationships because that’s a theme that just fascinates me. In the next few weeks, I’m going to try to read some very different books (genre and/or topic) and I’m quite excited about that. Also, I actually finished my Goodreads challenge (64 books, which is the number of books I read last year) and that’s SO COOL, I’m really happy about that.
I love Twenty One Pilots’ new album Trench more than every other album of the year. Since it came out a few weeks ago I basically haven’t listened to anything else. I love the lyrics and the sounds and just everything way more than I expected and I honestly still get goosebumps whenever I listen to Bandito or Leave The City. It’s just… perfection. And the only other two albums I call perfection are Lorde’s Melodrama and Bastille’s Wild World. So that’s definitely saying something. I wish I could write a blog post about the album but I honestly know nothing about music so that’s probably not the best idea.
look how beautiful my cat is ♡ pic.twitter.com/RBSePvWHyn
— tami 🌱 (@_notyourtoy) October 21, 2018
I’ve been thinking a lot about politics lately. My state had elections two weeks ago and I was really worried about/hopeful for the results and ??? I wasn’t disappointed?? That’s rare. Honestly, considering the place I live in and some other recent election results this was the best result we had a realistic chance for. Of course, there won’t be any real change but it’s something. Before the election, I read quite a lot about my state’s politicians/parties/voting system and it felt good to actually care about my surroundings more and I was really glad I could talk to a bunch of people about it, especially my mum though. It’s rare that we talk about serious topics but in the past few weeks, we had some really good discussions so that’s great. I also went to a small protest in my tiny town and I was kind of blown away by how many people show up. Maybe it’s not as conservative here as I thought.
I’ve spent a lot less time on social media and I’m 100% fine with it. This is due to various reasons:
- one of my school building has no signal whatsoever so I talk more to my classmates during breaks
- my new classmates are actually really cool so I LIKE talking to them
- I spent too much on social media during the summer and actually need a break
- I have less time due to school etc
- I found more cool things to occupy my time with
I still believe that social media can be great and that you can actually learn a lot of new stuff through it and find friends etc but I also know that it can be really toxic in certain communities and that there’s a lot of negativity on there. That negativity isn’t necessarily bad but it can be if you’re someone who can be influenced by that and who might get sad easily (hi). So yeah, even though I find reading about politics and the challenges people face really important I know this knowledge isn’t making me happier, especially when it’s worded in a very Twitter way so I try to figure out what’s better for me. And, I am able to get my news from different media as well. I’ve been listening to some really good news podcasts recently and that has definitely changed things for me. This is mostly true for Twitter, btw, I’m just rarely on tumblr because I forget about it more and more. Maybe this will change when I have more stuff to gif again but right now I’m just on it if I remember and am currently watching a video or something like that.
I’ve been more critical about my own behaviours and I think I’m learning a lot about myself through that. I have no idea how this started but I noticed that in the past few weeks (maybe months even?) I’ve actually been thinking a lot about how I react to people or criticism or how I argue or about what and about 1548 other small things. I think it’s really hard for me to change my behaviour or *be nicer* or whatever, but I’m glad I’m at least thinking about these things because I think that’s really important and I haven’t done that for quite a while. I guess I’m just trying to become a bit of a better/more social/more grown-up person and that’s a good thing.
How have you been recently?
See you soon ❤